Pains of the Past
by Nighttyger
Summary: A close brush on the battlefield hits a little too close to home. Lon'quxRobin


**This is my first Fire Emblem fic ever, so I hope I did well. And yeah, I decided ANs work well at the top. This was written by request from a prompt set I ran on my tumblr (link on my profile, if you wish to check it out and perhaps request something). While I don't remember the exact wording, the prompt was to the effect of "It's okay to cry". This is the result.**

 **i wish this pair got more love honestly they have such a nice dynamic**

 **Hope you enjoy it!**

 **-End Message, Nighttyger**

* * *

Robin rather disliked brigands.  
Even beyond the fact that they were currently trying to kill her, they just always seemed to appear at the most annoying of times, like when the Shepherds were traveling back to Ylisstol after a grueling campaign in Valm. She had barely managed to keep everyone alive during the war against Walhart; she just wanted to get _home.  
_ But no, these brigands had to show up and pick a fight they'd never even win. Even if there were quite a few of them.

She ran through the field, passing by a copse of trees which she marked on her mental map. She could use it for cover – but so could a brigand, and a bow- or magic-wielder in particular could be quite dangerous if they made use of it. There didn't seem to be anyone in the area, though, so she continued on.  
She came to a sword-wielding brigand and pulled out her Levin Sword. A few muttered words unleashed a bolt of lightning which leapt at her opponent, causing them to fall to the ground with hardly a cry. Transferring the jagged blade to her other hand, she rushed past the fallen swordsman towards an axe-wielder, unsheathing her silver sword. She slashed, shot, and dodged, secretly relishing the rush of battle and the scarlet warmth of blood as placed a final strike on her enemy.

She stood for a few seconds, breathing heavily, then stood straight and looked at the battle around her. Despite their numbers, the brigands were falling easily to the Shepherds. She was honestly surprised that there were so many – hadn't Chrom and Emmeryn done so much to eliminate their presence in Ylisse? Then again, she supposed, they had been gone for a long while. It was only natural that there would be an increase in such groups.

Wings flapped to her left. She looked up, but the sun was in just the right position to prevent her from seeing clearly. She backed up to try and reduce the glare. She didn't want to attack an ally.  
Her question was quickly answered by the pegasus rider yelling and swooping down at her, spear brandished. Definitely not an ally.  
Robin continued to back up, quicker now, trying to buy a few more seconds for her to grab her Arcwind tome. She wasn't able to preempt the rider's attack, however, so she spun to the right to avoid the spear. The same spellcasting process repeated, another page dissolved to ashes, another cadaver falling to the ground. It was really too bad the pegasus had to die as well, but there was no way to aim the magic so precisely.

Hearing rushing steps behind her, Robin turned, only to be chilled by the sight of five, six, seven brigands charging at her. She began to doubt her decision to fight on her own – overconfidence had always been a flaw of hers.

She launched blasts of wind at the group as she once again ran backwards. The more she could take out before they got to her, the better. A sudden drop-off caused her to lose her balance and tumble backwards into a small creek. She'd noticed it earlier, just by the copse of trees – had she really ran all the way back here? She had no time to think about such things, however, so she pushed the thought away and scrambled to her feet, scooping up her dropped tome. Luckily, magic tomes were waterproof – though the same couldn't be said for her clothes.  
She cursed, seeing the brigands were nearly upon her. A couple had stopped some ways away, on the other side of the creek – presumably mages or archers. She aimed one final blast towards the middle of the foes still rushing at her, then switched back to her silver sword, swinging at the ones who hadn't been pushed back by the spell. She kept herself mobile, moving so that the ranged attackers would be hard-pressed to properly aim at her. Slash, parry, dodge... she was all too familiar with the rhythm of battle.

With the slam of her blade against a sword-wielder's head, she had finished off the main rush of brigands, though not without some injuries to herself. She turned her attention to her foes across the creek. Keeping a weary eye on them, she pulled out her Levin Sword once more. There was only a mage and an archer left. Robin decided to take out the archer first, since it was harder to tell when they would attack. She launched a thunderbolt at her opponent, only to be scorched by droplets of liquid fire leaping up from the ground.

 _Where did they manage to get a Bolganone!? And how did I not see them cast it?_

Before she could retaliate (and she had half a mind to switch to her Arcfire time to do so), an arrow sprouted from the mage's neck. Somehow, her mind registered the direction that the arrow had come from. She turned her head to the right and saw a very familiar dark-haired assassin, bow in hand.

"Careless."

She wasn't sure if he was referring to her or the brigand, but she was happy to see her husband nonetheless.

"Lon'qu!"

He quickly made his way over to his spouse.

"You shouldn't go off alone like that."

Robin scratched at the back of her neck.

"Sorry... But it turned out all right, didn't it?" Her eyes caught how his jaw clenched at her nonchalant dismissal.

"It might not have." He was scanning the area now.

After a moment, Robin sighed.

"You're right. I'm sorry." Much to her relief, he relaxed.

"Just don't do it again." Then he added, "Though I don't know why I bother. You're going to do it again anywa-"

In a moment, he was diving towards her, pushing her to the ground. As she fell, Robin's only shocked thought was that in the short second before he acted, there had been _panic_ in his eyes.  
Panic was not an emotion she had ever seen him express.

As they hit earth, an arrow lodged itself in the ground just to the side. Robin laid there, winded by the impact and shock of the moment, but Lon'qu rolled and rose up faster than a gust of wind. In another second, he had let loose an arrow towards the copse of trees. There was the distinct sound of an arrow hitting flesh, and she saw a shadow tumble from its perch.  
As she stood up, she saw that her eyes had not been deceiving her, and it not been a fleeting, momentary emotion. He was looking around frantically, his bow already drawn again. His look was that of a cornered animal's, despite the wide-open field around them.

It wasn't until she had fully stood that he seemed to notice her. Even then, he just stared at her, the wildness not leaving his eyes, though he let the bow go slack.

"...Lon'qu?"

Suddenly, he pulled her to him. Robin's eyes widened at the sudden, out-of-character action, but she returned the gesture.

She could feel him shaking.

* * *

That evening, Robin was walking through the camp after visiting the infirmary and asking if they needed any supplies. They were out a couple of staves, but that was it. Everyone's injuries had been light. She had just dropped by her tent to write the required supplies down, but she wasn't ready to go to sleep. Something was bothering her.  
She walked by Lon'qu's tent, which was lit from inside. It reminded her of just what that something was.

After the moment on the battlefield, Lon'qu hadn't left her side, even after the battle – until she was taken in by the healers. He had slipped off while they were fixing her injuries, and she hadn't seen him since. Everything that had happened between them today... Robin wanted wanted to know what the reason behind her husband's behavior was.

She strided over to his tent and tapped on the fabric. When she received no answer, she opened the flap just enough to see inside. Lon'qu was kneeling, staring intently at a candle he had set on the ground in front of him. She poked her upper body into the tent, and his eyes flickered over to her momentarily before settling back on the flame.

"...Lon'qu? May I come in?"

He was silent for a few moments before letting out a small sound and shifting the candle to the side. Robin sat in front of him, cross-legged. The candle's light wavered, nearly extinguished by the movement of the air. Robin waited.  
They stared at each other for a few minutes.

"...Well?" Lon'qu finally said. Robin shifted her gaze away from him, trying to find a way to ask what she wanted. She knew he was still looking at her.

After a few moments, Robin looked back up.  
"...It's about earlier." He looked away at her words.

"You're wondering why I acted the way I did." Robin nodded, knowing he could see the movement. Lon'qu sighed.  
"I suppose it had to come up. You deserve to know..." He looked to her. "...Just know it is not easy for me to speak of."

She nodded solemnly.

"I grew up in the slums of Chon'sin. I often had to do unsavory things to survive. Despite this, there was a girl who lived on the outskirts of a village who befriended me. She often stole away to meet with me. We... we were in love." He went silent. The look in his eyes was pained and distant, and Robin could see him reliving the time as he spoke of it. She reached forward and put her hand on his, startling him out of his reverie.  
"...Sorry."

"No, it's all right. Take however long you need." She was fully willing to spend the entire night waiting, if that was what he required. Lon'qu, however, shook his head and continued.

"One day, we went to the fields for a picnic, and to spend some time by the river..." A long pause.

"...There were bandits."

Robin's eyes widened in horror as she had the sudden certain realization of what had happened, as all the pieces fell into place.

"I tried to fight them off... but there were too many. She... Ke'ri... died because of me."

Robin could feel tears welling up in her eyes, but she blinked them away as Lon'qu briefly looked to her.

"It was an arrow... that killed her, in the end."

Robin gasped, but quickly covered her mouth with her hand, stifling the noise. Her eyes stung madly, testing just how well she could could hold back the tears. She looked down to where her hand still rested on his before squeezing her eyes shut.  
It was no wonder, then, that there had been panic in his eyes. To lose two loved ones in the same way, to try and fail to save them both, would be a crueler joke than any she could think of.  
And yet he never showed the pain he must feel, even as she sat in front of him, barely able to keep herself from crying.

She wouldn't cry. She wouldn't cause him even more pain just because she couldn't keep her emotions in check.

She felt a warmth on top of her hand, and she opened her eyes to find him looking to where his hand now covered hers.

"You can cry. You're allowed."

"But-"

"I've watched people all my life. Some people need to cry." He looked at her. "You're one of them."

She stared at him a moment, a stupid piece of pride wanting to prove him wrong, but that part of her was quickly overwhelmed, and she fell into him, hugging him, shaking with tears and their hitched breaths. He wrapped his arms around her, letting her muffle her sobs in his chest.

Finally, her breathing returned to normal, but she remained there, enjoying the feeling for just a few more minutes. However, she knew that it had to end eventually, so she pulled herself away.

"I'm sorry..."

"Don't be."

She smiled up at him, and he gave her a small one in return a few moments later. She closed her eyes, relishing the rare gift, only for them to fly open again when a new thought entered her mind.

"Is something wrong?"

"The children..." she breathed. Sadness overcame her once more as another horrible realization swept over her.  
Lon'qu stayed silent, waiting for her to voice her thoughts, just as she did for him.  
"I've seen them look at us.. their parents, I mean... sometimes, like they're terrified of them. And sometimes they say things... That's why, isn't it? They don't want to lose them... again..." Yet more tears threatened to spill from her eyes.  
"I knew... I knew that was... But I just now..."

He pulled her close to him again, and she began to cry once more. There were no sobs this time; the tears simply traced their way down her face.  
After some time, not as long as before, the tears stopped flowing again; she pulled away more immediately this time. She opened her mouth to apologize once more, but stopped herself. Instead, she gave a deep sigh.

A few moments passed.

"...You might as well just stay with me tonight."

Robin smiled slightly, glad for her husband's company.

"...Alright."


End file.
